I disappeared again. I would make up more excuses about how life gets in the way, the kids being sick, and all of that - but the truth is that I've been uninspired.
Not that I don't have anything to say, I am hardly ever at a loss for words, but I just haven't felt like sitting down and writing.
I love to write. I feel like my life isn't complete if I am not writing something. I used to love when part of my professional career involved writing, but lately I haven't been writing - anywhere in my life.
At first, sitting down to write felt so forced. Setting time aside to sit down and write took the joy out of it. It was starting to feel like a chore and that is the exact moment when I lost my inspiration. Writing for the sake of writing isn't what I love.
The break felt good at first. I felt somewhat liberated. I wasn't constantly checking my email or google reader. I had lots of free time. I felt like I had a life. Then I started to miss it. There was something about me that wasn't complete.
I would curl up on the couch watching a movie and would even tell my husband, "I haven't even written in my blog". At first it seemed like an accomplishment and then I noticed the twinges of self-doubt in my voice.
I feared opening up my email and my computer because I hadn't read blogs in so long. I cringed when I wanted to come to my space to write but feared it had been too long.
The truth is, that I love my little space and I love the person that I am when I contribute here.
I am re-dedicating myself to my little space here. Re-dedicating myself to the love of writing that started it all.
This space isn't just about me, it's about my children and the journey that we've taken to get to this point. It is about the journey we have taken as a family - to live abroad, to explore new cultures, to expose ourselves to new things.
I hope that I haven't lost you completely on this journey of self discovery and that you will follow me on my new adventures in this space.