Friday Funny: La Toilette

I have a serious problem:  I hate to use public restrooms.  This includes at gas stations, restaurants and even at work.  My small bladder only exaggerates this problem since I find myself having to use public restrooms more often than I would like.

I just hate thinking about all of germs and people who have been there before me.  It kind of grosses me out.  This is why at times I try to squat over the toilet trying to avoid touching anything in the room; because we as women have been cursed with the inability to pee standing up.

I'll never forget one of my first days at work in France.  I remember having sat through what seemed like the longest meeting in my life and having to pee.  I rushed out to try and find the restroom.  When I walked in there were two stalls and one was occupied at the time.

I walked into the second one and saw this.

actual bathroom in my office


Dancing around trying not to pee my pants I went back out and checked the door.

It had the little figure with the skirt so I was in the right bathroom.

I couldn't even believe it.  What was I supposed to do here?  Where were the instructions?

I couldn't hold it in any longer.  I put my feet around the rigged edges and squatted down.  

I could go into specifics, but I won't.  I'll just say that it was not a pleasant experience.  There is an entire technique that goes into peeing in this type of bathroom, and my aim was not so good.

I was obviously not a good a squatter as I thought I was.

From that day on, I avoided that bathroom like the plague.  Later I found out that the other stall was a normal bathroom with germ filled toilet seat and all.  Even now, when I walk into the bathroom I can't help but giggle and the hole on the floor.

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kristance ann said...

is that common in france? i admit this post made me laugh a little. i probably would have gotten pee all over myself!

Quiana said...

Oh wow! I know the feeling - the public toilets are like that in Japan and the first time I had to go during DH's basketball game I was so surprised. After I irately asked him why he didn't warn me and he said he forgot. I was SO traumatized! People also had their own handkerchiefs for drying their hands, which I didn't know was the custom, so I had to let mine air dry. Oh the joys of being abroad and dealing with bodily function!

Michelle said...

Ha, I love it! You'd never used a squatty potty before? It's something everybody should have to do at least once. =)

Katharine said...

Welcome to Beijing...the squat toilets are totally gross. I don't understand how older women do it!

Melissa said...

OMGoodness! I would've had your exact reaction! I don't even know how you knew what to do! Kudos to you!

Jill said...

Oh girl, you are not alone. I don't think anyone likes public restrooms. The hole in the floor is hilarious. They have those everywhere outside the US but I've actually never seen them in an office building or home, just the public ones. Well, think of it this way, it's a good work out for the legs and butt! :)

tracy said...

Worst toilet ever - a squatter in China that was a trough going across the whole bathroom with everyone's ahem..stuff floating past you.

MilkJam said...

squat toilets are the most hygienic because as you said you're not touching anyone else's germs.

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