Friday Funny: Work Doctor

In France, shortly after getting hired it is required that all people receive a physical from a doctor.  Usually this is a doctor that is picked by the company, a "medecin de travail".  Since our company is big they have an infirmary on site with their very own doctors and nurses, and so I scheduled  my appointment for my first week of work.

I had been told what to expect from colleagues, but I seriously thought that they were joking with me.  I mean the things they were telling me couldn't possibly happen during a "routine physical.

Since I had only been in France a short time I spoke ZERO French and of course the nurses spoke little to no English.  What else was new.  The physical was pretty standard:  vision test, hearing test a urine sample (I can only imagine what they were checking for).

Then I was taken to an exam room that had multiple doors.  The nurse explained that I was to go into one of these "rooms" take off all my clothes and wait for the doctor to come in and get me.  Excusez-moi?


Thinking that I was  a complete idiot, the nurse explained with hand gestures what I was supposed to do.  Lucky for me, since she motioned that I was to keep my bra and underwear on.  Whew.  That would have been awkward.

The room was the size of a closet and I could NOT believe that I was supposed to stand there in my underwear waiting for the doctor.  I looked for a robe but there wasn't one.  And so I undressed.  I was thankful that I didn't sport a thong that day (or my grammy panties for that matter).  At least they had magazines for me to read {in french of course} while I sat there awaiting total humiliation.

The doctor then opened the door and welcomed me into the room.  We both walked over to his desk where I was told to sit down while we began the Q & A.  Awesome.  He asked about my lifestyle, my personal life, whether I was a smoker, etc.  Little did I know it was about to get worse.

While he sat at his desk he motioned for me to stand.  I was the instructed to walk towards the window on the far end of the room and walk back.  Now I'm not a medical professional, nor do I have any sort of medical training but what can you possibly diagnose from a 1/2 naked person walking around the room? I was reassured when I found out later that the men have to do the same test, so at least I know the doctor is an equal opportunity perv.

After my sexy strut down the exam room, I was told to go towards the scale and weigh myself.  What?  He continued to sit behind his desk and asked me to call out my weight.  How is that for professional?  I wonder how many women actually tell the truth and not shave off a pound or two (or ten)?

He {FINALLY} came towards me and asked me to sit on the exam table.  We did the old school reflex tests, heart tests, etc.

When we were all done, he signed my release form and we were all done.  I put on my clothes and leaving my humility behind went back to my office.

The BEST thing is that since he is an office doctor, I occasionally see him at the cafeteria.  The sad thing is that when I have lunch with my husband there is more than one man in the room that has seen me in my underwear.

Lucky for all of us, we have to repeat this lovely procedure every two years!  LOVE!
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5 comments:

Jen said...

Oh dear! I will NEVER forget the tuberculosis x-ray we had to get when we first moved here.. walking into the big room with many nurses totally naked from the belly button up and having to put your hands behind your head. It is like that nightmare where you go to school naked. I almost, physically, couldn't walk into the room.. my husband made me. But, considering the recent ads at the bus stops, there clearly are no issues with bare boobs here.

Katharine said...

I am still waiting for my physical in Beijing...now I'm a little scared.

Liz said...

i cannot believe they trust people to honestly weight themselves! how weird to sit there, answering questions, in just your underwear. And then walking all over the room? so crazy!

Michelle said...

LOL. You have the funniest stories! Do all of your Friday Funnies involve you having to take your clothes off? :-)

Sarah said...

I have actually had to walk around for US physicals too. Thankfully I did have a gown on though. The walking is to examine your gait.

I love all your Friday Funnies!

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